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Old 06-14-2004, 02:36 AM
  #451  
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Talking

AMG

Was your joke based on a real life experience by yourself .???ha ha ha .


cheers
michael
Old 06-14-2004, 02:46 AM
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> 13 THOUGHTS FOR TODAY
>
>
> 13. Never take life too seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
>
> 12. Life is sexually transmitted.
>
> 11. Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
>
> 10. Men have two emotions: hungry and horny. If you see him without an
> erection, make him a sandwich.
>
> 9. Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use
> the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
>
> 8. Some people are like Slinkies...not really good for anything, but you
> still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
>
> 7. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying
> of nothing.
>
> 6. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
>
> 5. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to
> criticism.
>
> 4. Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a
> substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
>
> 3. In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
> weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
>
> 2. Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to
> realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
>
> And the number one thought for the day:
>
> 1. You read about terrorists; most of them came here legally, but they hung
> around on these expired visas, some as long as 10-15 years. Now, compare
> that to Blockbuster; you are two days late with a video and those people
> are all over you. I think we should put Blockbuster in charge of immigration.
>
cheers
michael
Old 06-14-2004, 06:01 AM
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I am bored
Old 06-14-2004, 06:05 AM
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Talking

Go and drive your car pick up a hot looking hichhiker and do the mammal.

cheers
michael
Old 06-15-2004, 08:43 PM
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I am working on my new profile
Old 06-23-2004, 07:18 PM
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Parrot Joke.

3 parrots down the chute......

Just wait & watch

(if it runs slow in your browser, just right-click "Save as" to your hard drive, and open locally.)
Attached Thumbnails The Lounge....Aussie-NZ-parrot-chute.gif  

Last edited by Hymee; 06-23-2004 at 07:21 PM.
Old 06-27-2004, 10:02 AM
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what is that... too funny? :D
Old 07-01-2004, 09:14 PM
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Hughesy is thinking joining the club

Dave Hughes said this morning on the radio that he is thinking of buying himself a Mazda RX-8 (he said XR-8 dumb ***)...

I emailed him --- thought of calling to the show but didn't...
Old 07-02-2004, 02:04 AM
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Who is he? Maybe he wants a Ford RX-8? Hehe
Old 07-02-2004, 02:12 AM
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Dave Hughes is the famous comedian in Australia... I love his show. He is thinking of getting the new Mazda but he does not know if it is the RX-8 or the XR-8. One caller with an V8 called and he said - "no this is not I am going to get"

He did not service his last car - a Corolla - for the last 20000km so I gave him an email about the car - I fear him going for the automatic... coz his last car was an automatic

http://www.nova100.com.au/hkd.asp
Old 07-06-2004, 08:22 PM
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Hahaha.....I did the same thing, rang up the Mazda dealer and said "Hi, this is Steve, I spoke to you yesterday about buying an XR8.....".......Easily done when you own one and have lived and breathed Fords for a few years!

Damn, would have been funny to hear that Hughsy thing. I'm in Samoa and have missed the latest. Had a cabbie today who thought his diesel corolla was a Kenworth......he made shoooshing airbrake noises every time he used the brakes. It was a pisser!

Gomez.
Old 07-06-2004, 10:07 PM
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^^^^^^^^^^^ ROFLMAO!!!!!
Old 07-07-2004, 08:42 PM
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Hughesy has got himself a silver Mazda RX-8!!!

He is picking it up on Saturday and I think he got it from Brighton Mazda or City Mazda --- he lives in St. Kilda remember and I doubt he will go far from home to pick up his car!

Taka
Old 07-07-2004, 09:30 PM
  #464  
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Need to get him on this board... so those of us who think we're comedians can go back to our day jobs and leave it up to the professionals. :p
Old 07-07-2004, 09:40 PM
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I emailed Nova and told him that ... it is up to him... of course we can start the thread of spotting Hughesy.

He is quite nice and open for a celeb...

He lives in St Kilda near Acland Street and drive to Nova in Richmond everyday next week. Very easy to spot him. I am sure he will complain of petrol consumption.
Old 07-08-2004, 06:36 PM
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Apparently Hughesy said on the radio he is picking his car up TODAY (Fri 9) and he is asking on the radio where to fang his car... idiot
Old 07-08-2004, 11:08 PM
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Originally posted by takahashi
Apparently Hughesy said on the radio he is picking his car up TODAY (Fri 9) and he is asking on the radio where to fang his car... idiot
Easy Taka......Hughesy's just shootin' the breeze....that's his job after all! He knows (like all Melbournians) that the Black Spur and the G.O.R are the top two driving roads in town.......
Old 07-08-2004, 11:37 PM
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It is controversial to say any "fang" area as the TAC may be on their back coz they are promoting speed driving...

Why put yourself on a situation that the authority can be hold that against you... I guess they are looking for ratings... They do it pretty well and I think sometimes if they push an inch too far they will be in trouble esp there are children listening to the show
Old 07-12-2004, 04:59 PM
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This one is funny




> To: All Al Qaeda Fighters
>
> Subject: The Cave :D
>
> Internal Memo. Do Not Distribute Outside The
> Organisation.
>
> Hi guys. We've all been putting in long hours recently
> but we've really come together as a group and I love
> that! However, while we are fighting a jihad, we can't
> forget to take care of the cave, and frankly I have a
> few concerns:
>
> First of all, while it's good to be concerned about
> cruise missiles, we should be even more concerned
> about the dust in our cave. We want to avoid excessive
> dust inhalation, (a health and safety issue) - so we
> need to sweep the cave daily. I've done my bit on the
> cleaning rota ...have you? I've posted a sign-up sheet
> near the cave reception area (next to the halal
> toaster).
>
> Second, it's not often I make a video address but when
> I do, I'm trying to scare the s**t out of most of the
> world's population, okay? That means that while we're
> taping, please do not ride your scooter in the
> background or keep doing the 'Wassup' thing. Thanks.
>
> Third: Food. I bought a box of Dairylea recently,
> clearly wrote "Ossy" on the front, and put it on the
> top shelf. Today, two of my Dairylea slices were gone.
> Consideration. That's all I'm saying.
>
> Fourth: I'm not against team spirit and all that, but
> we must distance ourselves from the Infidel's bat and
> ball games. Please do not chant "Ossy, Ossy, Ossy, Oy,
> Oy, Oy" when I ride past on the donkey. Thanks.
>
> Five: Graffiti. Whoever wrote "OSAMA F***S DONKEYS" on
> the group toilet wall It's a lie, the donkey backed
> into me, whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of
> the mountain.
>
> Six: The use of chickens is strictly for food. Assam,
> the old excuse that the 'chicken backed into me,
> whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of the
> mountain' will not be accepted in future. (With
> donkeys, there is a grey area.)
>
> Finally, we've heard that there may be Western
> soldiers in disguise trying to infiltrate our ranks. I
> want to set up patrols to look for them. First patrol
> will be Omar, Muhammad, Abdul, Akbar and Dave.
>
> Love you lots,
>
> Group Hug.
>
> Os.
>
>
> PS - I'm sick of having "Osama's Bed Linen" scribbled
> on my laundry bag. Cut it out, it's not funny anymore.
>
>
>
> __________________________________
> Do you Yahoo!?
> New and Improved Yahoo! Mail - Send 10MB messages!
> http://promotions.yahoo.com/new_mail
>

------ End of Forwarded Message
Old 07-13-2004, 04:32 AM
  #470  
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L&L,

Your boss gave you specific instruction not to distribute outside the organisation. Now I have the CIA beating a path to my door!

Cheers,
Hymee.
Old 07-13-2004, 06:21 PM
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Hughesy gave me a call yesterday but I missed it. I have his voice on my answering machine :o... I should invite him to the Melbourne meet shouldn't I?

Any other state organising an annerversary of RX-8 in Australia?
Old 07-13-2004, 06:26 PM
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Good idea Taka.
Old 07-13-2004, 06:32 PM
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I am thinking if I get on to Hughesy I might get him to announce it on Nova 100.3's breakfast show
Old 07-25-2004, 11:59 PM
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Dentists on the forum, lookout !!!

"CBC reports that the tranquil music that wafts through many dental offices to soothe patients and mask the sounds of the drill may soon be silenced. The music industry is putting the bite on dentists -- demanding that they pay for the right to play it. The Society of Composers, Authors and Music Publishers of Canada would also like to extend this policy to 'coffee shops, clothing stores, lounges, elevators -- even radio tunes that people hear on the telephone while on hold.'
Old 07-26-2004, 05:08 AM
  #475  
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Originally Posted by dbb
Dentists on the forum, lookout !!!

"CBC reports that the tranquil music that wafts through many dental offices to soothe patients and mask the sounds of the drill may soon be silenced. The music industry is putting the bite on dentists -- demanding that they pay for the right to play it. The Society of Composers, Authors and Music Publishers of Canada would also like to extend this policy to 'coffee shops, clothing stores, lounges, elevators -- even radio tunes that people hear on the telephone while on hold.'
I predict that the entire music industry will collapse as we know it over the next 10 years...

I also think that if the cost of new release CD's (you know - the ones, with 2 good tracks and 15 crap ones for $30) were more realistically priced ... say $5~7 ... then the industry wouldn't be in such a vulnerable and threatened position.


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