Tough decision! Please HELP!
03-15-2010, 11:55 AM
#1
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Tough decision! Please HELP!
Hi y'all, I have an '04 Winning Blue RX-8 GT and I'm married. My wife doesn't care for the car but I like it. We're planning to start a family. I'm a year away from owning having the title to the car and I was originally planning to use the car payment on mods. But my wife wants a baby friendly car. We both have full time jobs and she's fine with her '03 Honda Civic for transporting a baby to day care but I will have to pick the kid up because she works the evening shift.
I need proof of the RX-8 being able to transport a baby in order for me to keep my sports car! I like SUVs but I don't know if I want another car payment with a kid on top of it. SO PLEASE! Someone tell me and show me proof that it's doable because if not I'll need to get an SUV or family sedan. If it is not doable what are your recommendations for good family friendly vehicles? I would still want to good performance though at a reasonable price...family vehicles just isn't my niche.
I need proof of the RX-8 being able to transport a baby in order for me to keep my sports car! I like SUVs but I don't know if I want another car payment with a kid on top of it. SO PLEASE! Someone tell me and show me proof that it's doable because if not I'll need to get an SUV or family sedan. If it is not doable what are your recommendations for good family friendly vehicles? I would still want to good performance though at a reasonable price...family vehicles just isn't my niche.
03-15-2010, 12:06 PM
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Me thinks your wife is just looking for an excuse for you to get rid of your car.
It is entirely possible to put a car seat in the back seat of the 8. I know that there are several threads on the boards discussing this, and here is one of them:
https://www.rx8club.com/rx-8-discussion-3/rx-8-children-51511/
and another
https://www.rx8club.com/australia-new-zealand-forum-37/install-baby-seat-81586/
It is entirely possible to put a car seat in the back seat of the 8. I know that there are several threads on the boards discussing this, and here is one of them:
https://www.rx8club.com/rx-8-discussion-3/rx-8-children-51511/
and another
https://www.rx8club.com/australia-new-zealand-forum-37/install-baby-seat-81586/
Last edited by Riley Craven; 03-15-2010 at 12:13 PM.
03-15-2010, 12:26 PM
#6
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Nah...it's not like that. I wear the pants in this relationship...most of the time! LOL. She care about practicality and I don't want to have switch out cars with her just so I can pick up a baby from day care.
If there are any parents out there with RX-8s or people who know of couple with a baby and an RX-8 please give advice. I know you can fit a toddler car sit seat, which is less bulky than an infant car seat. I need to know about transporting a newborn.
If there are any parents out there with RX-8s or people who know of couple with a baby and an RX-8 please give advice. I know you can fit a toddler car sit seat, which is less bulky than an infant car seat. I need to know about transporting a newborn.
03-15-2010, 12:47 PM
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i have put an infant car seat in the back of my 8, (as well as a toddler car seat) and had zero issues with it when i did it. i am not only a mom, but i have been trusted with my friends babies and transporting them on occasion. the rx8 is a very safe vehicle. because i am kinda short and my seat is all the way forward it was convenient to put the infant seat behind me on the drivers side. but for a guy you may find it easier to put the seat behind the passenger side. the infant seats are bulky yes, but bulky also means nice and snug in the seat. just put a protective seat cover down first to protect your seat. they sell them in the baby section.
also, the 8 is very convenient when your baby gets to be an actual walking activity-laden kid. my daughter is 9 and loves my car. maybe borrow one of your friends infant seats and practice the art of smoothly getting the seat in your 8 THEN show your wife, "see honey, its going to work." best of luck!!
also, the 8 is very convenient when your baby gets to be an actual walking activity-laden kid. my daughter is 9 and loves my car. maybe borrow one of your friends infant seats and practice the art of smoothly getting the seat in your 8 THEN show your wife, "see honey, its going to work." best of luck!!
03-15-2010, 12:51 PM
#8
I was having the same problem with my wife so I just bought a 98 jeep grand cherokee as a second vehicle. This SUV only cost $2,000 cash and runs great. I have had it for over a year now. My wife drives a pontiac solstice so we just picked her up an 01 explorer for $1,800cash. Now we both have a sports car and a family car. I handle most car maintenance myself so purchasing an older vehicle which may require work was an option for me. Search around I wouldn't recommend trading in your 8 because chances are you won't get what you deserve for it.
03-15-2010, 01:01 PM
#10
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i have put an infant car seat in the back of my 8, (as well as a toddler car seat) and had zero issues with it when i did it. i am not only a mom, but i have been trusted with my friends babies and transporting them on occasion. the rx8 is a very safe vehicle. because i am kinda short and my seat is all the way forward it was convenient to put the infant seat behind me on the drivers side. but for a guy you may find it easier to put the seat behind the passenger side. the infant seats are bulky yes, but bulky also means nice and snug in the seat. just put a protective seat cover down first to protect your seat. they sell them in the baby section.
also, the 8 is very convenient when your baby gets to be an actual walking activity-laden kid. my daughter is 9 and loves my car. maybe borrow one of your friends infant seats and practice the art of smoothly getting the seat in your 8 THEN show your wife, "see honey, its going to work." best of luck!!
also, the 8 is very convenient when your baby gets to be an actual walking activity-laden kid. my daughter is 9 and loves my car. maybe borrow one of your friends infant seats and practice the art of smoothly getting the seat in your 8 THEN show your wife, "see honey, its going to work." best of luck!!
03-15-2010, 01:29 PM
#11
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I was having the same problem with my wife so I just bought a 98 jeep grand cherokee as a second vehicle. This SUV only cost $2,000 cash and runs great. I have had it for over a year now. My wife drives a pontiac solstice so we just picked her up an 01 explorer for $1,800cash. Now we both have a sports car and a family car. I handle most car maintenance myself so purchasing an older vehicle which may require work was an option for me. Search around I wouldn't recommend trading in your 8 because chances are you won't get what you deserve for it.
03-15-2010, 01:53 PM
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not to shoot down the front seat idea with any disrespect, but speaking as a woman, that is the sure fire way to get his wife to veto the 8 hands down. most brand new mommies are gonna be verrrrrry anti-front-seat even with airbag disabled. its just not the best place for a rear-facing infant seat. the seats do fit in the rear, and its safer back there. just something to think about.... she is going to read up on every scrap of information she can if she planning for a baby, and all of her friends who are parents and all of her mommy group people with dissapprove of an infant seat in the front and give her detailed horror stories to help cement how that is dangerous.
03-15-2010, 02:24 PM
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not to shoot down the front seat idea with any disrespect, but speaking as a woman, that is the sure fire way to get his wife to veto the 8 hands down. most brand new mommies are gonna be verrrrrry anti-front-seat even with airbag disabled. its just not the best place for a rear-facing infant seat. the seats do fit in the rear, and its safer back there. just something to think about.... she is going to read up on every scrap of information she can if she planning for a baby, and all of her friends who are parents and all of her mommy group people with dissapprove of an infant seat in the front and give her detailed horror stories to help cement how that is dangerous.
Does it really matter where the seat is in the back???
03-15-2010, 02:31 PM
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Just like shinka said, my wife works with at a hospital with a bunch of moms and baby experts on a daily basis. She is well armed with horror stories of car accidents and baby info in general, which is why I have to get the evidence I need to back me for the ensuing battle that's ahead.
03-15-2010, 02:45 PM
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i have never had issue with placing the infant seat behind the driver or passenger. i'm sure you can arm yourself with safety stats on your 2004 8. off the top of my head i know the 04 has the standard safety pretensioners on the seatbelts, side airbags, and i'm sure more if you google. research a little so you can give an informed debate to get your side heard. if you really wanna keep your car you can easily supply enough facts to help you out. just from personal experience alone, i wouldnt put my daughter or any of my friends kids and babies in my car if i didnt feel 1000% that they werent safe. the reality is, it will be a bit of a hassle getting the seat in and out, and if you put behind passenger side you are gonna have to move the seat alllll the way forward to get seat in, then move seat back once baby is in place to offer more support to seat stability. so yea its not gonna be a quick 30 second get the baby in and out of the car. but with a baby you shouldnt be rushing in and out of the car anyway. so it all balances out in my humble opinion. just do some research and print it out to give your wife (who rightly deserves to be protective of her unborn) so she can see for herself that the 8 is safe not only when the baby is an infant, but thru the rest of the stages that come rather quickly and before you know it the infant, toddler, booster seats will be out of your car.
03-15-2010, 02:57 PM
#18
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i have never had issue with placing the infant seat behind the driver or passenger. i'm sure you can arm yourself with safety stats on your 2004 8. off the top of my head i know the 04 has the standard safety pretensioners on the seatbelts, side airbags, and i'm sure more if you google. research a little so you can give an informed debate to get your side heard. if you really wanna keep your car you can easily supply enough facts to help you out. just from personal experience alone, i wouldnt put my daughter or any of my friends kids and babies in my car if i didnt feel 1000% that they werent safe. the reality is, it will be a bit of a hassle getting the seat in and out, and if you put behind passenger side you are gonna have to move the seat alllll the way forward to get seat in, then move seat back once baby is in place to offer more support to seat stability. so yea its not gonna be a quick 30 second get the baby in and out of the car. but with a baby you shouldnt be rushing in and out of the car anyway. so it all balances out in my humble opinion. just do some research and print it out to give your wife (who rightly deserves to be protective of her unborn) so she can see for herself that the 8 is safe not only when the baby is an infant, but thru the rest of the stages that come rather quickly and before you know it the infant, toddler, booster seats will be out of your car.
Oh, I just thought of this: what if the side air bags deploy in a car accident? The baby would be alright wouldn't it?
03-15-2010, 03:12 PM
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i just did a search on google for rear facing infant seats and BACKseat side air bag safety. i found articles on front seat side air bags (not good) but so far found nothing on BACKseat side airbags having safety issue with rearfacing infant seats..
but dont take my word on it, (seriously), you have to be comfortable with what you find when you do your research. you have to ultimatly be the one who is confident that your car is safe for your baby. everyone's situation is unique, and comfort levels are unique.
but dont take my word on it, (seriously), you have to be comfortable with what you find when you do your research. you have to ultimatly be the one who is confident that your car is safe for your baby. everyone's situation is unique, and comfort levels are unique.
03-15-2010, 04:49 PM
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Well honestly you have to look at this different ways.
1. If she honestly worries that much about all the horror stories people tell her about getting into wrecks then why bother driving the baby around in a car at all? At some point worrying about all the things that could happen or could go wrong gets silly. Let’s say for example that you could work on cars and did buy a 2 grand used vehicle, would something that old have all the safety features of a brand new 2010 vehicle? Not really. Point being that in everything we do there is risk, at some point you have to say to yourself, I've done enough to lower the risk factors to where I feel safe to have a normal life.
2. Are there other issues at work here that makes her so adamant that you get rid of your car? With everything you've said so far in this thread it doesn’t sound like your wife is the convincible type. It seems like any facts that you arm yourself with will never be enough to convince her that the car is safe. If that’s the case then really you have two choices, compromise on the issue or do what you want regardless.
3. If there are so many safety issues why the car then why drive it yourself? If its not safe enough for a baby, then why would it be safe enough for you? At this point I think that the 8 is probably one of the safest sports cars on the road. We've seen several threads on this board of some crazy accidents that people have walked away from with bumps and bruises while the car was literally shredded. Just doing a quick google search I am sure you can find multiple wreck threads that look amazing awful with no serious injuries.
Keep in mind, I say all of this with a pregnant wife who is due in July that is very supportive of the car. Marriage is an interesting thing, and in all honesty the goal of a marriage should be to constantly make your spouse happy. In a good marriage this works both ways so that you are always pouring into the other. Why do you think the divorce rate is so high today? So many people today approach marriage as a means to get something out of it with selfish reason. My wife knows how happy driving the 8 makes me, and I know how happy other things make her. Just some food for thought.
1. If she honestly worries that much about all the horror stories people tell her about getting into wrecks then why bother driving the baby around in a car at all? At some point worrying about all the things that could happen or could go wrong gets silly. Let’s say for example that you could work on cars and did buy a 2 grand used vehicle, would something that old have all the safety features of a brand new 2010 vehicle? Not really. Point being that in everything we do there is risk, at some point you have to say to yourself, I've done enough to lower the risk factors to where I feel safe to have a normal life.
2. Are there other issues at work here that makes her so adamant that you get rid of your car? With everything you've said so far in this thread it doesn’t sound like your wife is the convincible type. It seems like any facts that you arm yourself with will never be enough to convince her that the car is safe. If that’s the case then really you have two choices, compromise on the issue or do what you want regardless.
3. If there are so many safety issues why the car then why drive it yourself? If its not safe enough for a baby, then why would it be safe enough for you? At this point I think that the 8 is probably one of the safest sports cars on the road. We've seen several threads on this board of some crazy accidents that people have walked away from with bumps and bruises while the car was literally shredded. Just doing a quick google search I am sure you can find multiple wreck threads that look amazing awful with no serious injuries.
Keep in mind, I say all of this with a pregnant wife who is due in July that is very supportive of the car. Marriage is an interesting thing, and in all honesty the goal of a marriage should be to constantly make your spouse happy. In a good marriage this works both ways so that you are always pouring into the other. Why do you think the divorce rate is so high today? So many people today approach marriage as a means to get something out of it with selfish reason. My wife knows how happy driving the 8 makes me, and I know how happy other things make her. Just some food for thought.
Last edited by Riley Craven; 03-15-2010 at 04:51 PM.
03-15-2010, 04:54 PM
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Well honestly you have to look at this different ways.
1. If she honestly worries that much about all the horror stories people tell her about getting into wrecks then why bother driving the baby around in a car at all? At some point worrying about all the things that could happen or could go wrong gets silly. Let’s say for example that you could work on cars and did buy a 2 grand used vehicle, would something that old have all the safety features of a brand new 2010 vehicle? Not really. Point being that in everything we do there is risk, at some point you have to say to yourself, I've done enough to lower the risk factors to where I feel safe to have a normal life.
2. Are there other issues at work here that makes her so adamant that you get rid of your car? With everything you've said so far in this thread it doesn’t sound like your wife is the convincible type. It seems like any facts that you arm yourself with will never be enough to convince her that the car is safe. If that’s the case then really you have two choices, compromise on the issue or do what you want regardless.
3. If there are so many safety issues why the car then why drive it yourself? If its not safe enough for a baby, then why would it be safe enough for you? At this point I think that the 8 is probably one of the safest sports cars on the road. We've seen several threads on this board of some crazy accidents that people have walked away from with bumps and bruises while the car was literally shredded. Just doing a quick google search I am sure you can find multiple wreck threads that look amazing awful with no serious injuries.
Keep in mind, I say all of this with a pregnant wife who is due in July that is very supportive of the car. Marriage is an interesting thing, and in all honesty the goal of a marriage should be to constantly make your spouse happy. In a good marriage this works both ways so that you are always pouring into the other. Why do you think the divorce rate is so high today? So many people today approach marriage as a means to get something out of it with selfish reason. My wife knows how happy driving the 8 makes me, and I know how happy other things make her. Just some food for thought.
1. If she honestly worries that much about all the horror stories people tell her about getting into wrecks then why bother driving the baby around in a car at all? At some point worrying about all the things that could happen or could go wrong gets silly. Let’s say for example that you could work on cars and did buy a 2 grand used vehicle, would something that old have all the safety features of a brand new 2010 vehicle? Not really. Point being that in everything we do there is risk, at some point you have to say to yourself, I've done enough to lower the risk factors to where I feel safe to have a normal life.
2. Are there other issues at work here that makes her so adamant that you get rid of your car? With everything you've said so far in this thread it doesn’t sound like your wife is the convincible type. It seems like any facts that you arm yourself with will never be enough to convince her that the car is safe. If that’s the case then really you have two choices, compromise on the issue or do what you want regardless.
3. If there are so many safety issues why the car then why drive it yourself? If its not safe enough for a baby, then why would it be safe enough for you? At this point I think that the 8 is probably one of the safest sports cars on the road. We've seen several threads on this board of some crazy accidents that people have walked away from with bumps and bruises while the car was literally shredded. Just doing a quick google search I am sure you can find multiple wreck threads that look amazing awful with no serious injuries.
Keep in mind, I say all of this with a pregnant wife who is due in July that is very supportive of the car. Marriage is an interesting thing, and in all honesty the goal of a marriage should be to constantly make your spouse happy. In a good marriage this works both ways so that you are always pouring into the other. Why do you think the divorce rate is so high today? So many people today approach marriage as a means to get something out of it with selfish reason. My wife knows how happy driving the 8 makes me, and I know how happy other things make her. Just some food for thought.
my friend you have lots of things to think about, keep us posted on what you ultimatly decide to do!!!
03-16-2010, 12:59 AM
#22
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Thread Starter
Well honestly you have to look at this different ways.
1. If she honestly worries that much about all the horror stories people tell her about getting into wrecks then why bother driving the baby around in a car at all? At some point worrying about all the things that could happen or could go wrong gets silly. Let’s say for example that you could work on cars and did buy a 2 grand used vehicle, would something that old have all the safety features of a brand new 2010 vehicle? Not really. Point being that in everything we do there is risk, at some point you have to say to yourself, I've done enough to lower the risk factors to where I feel safe to have a normal life.
2. Are there other issues at work here that makes her so adamant that you get rid of your car? With everything you've said so far in this thread it doesn’t sound like your wife is the convincible type. It seems like any facts that you arm yourself with will never be enough to convince her that the car is safe. If that’s the case then really you have two choices, compromise on the issue or do what you want regardless.
3. If there are so many safety issues why the car then why drive it yourself? If its not safe enough for a baby, then why would it be safe enough for you? At this point I think that the 8 is probably one of the safest sports cars on the road. We've seen several threads on this board of some crazy accidents that people have walked away from with bumps and bruises while the car was literally shredded. Just doing a quick google search I am sure you can find multiple wreck threads that look amazing awful with no serious injuries.
Keep in mind, I say all of this with a pregnant wife who is due in July that is very supportive of the car. Marriage is an interesting thing, and in all honesty the goal of a marriage should be to constantly make your spouse happy. In a good marriage this works both ways so that you are always pouring into the other. Why do you think the divorce rate is so high today? So many people today approach marriage as a means to get something out of it with selfish reason. My wife knows how happy driving the 8 makes me, and I know how happy other things make her. Just some food for thought.
1. If she honestly worries that much about all the horror stories people tell her about getting into wrecks then why bother driving the baby around in a car at all? At some point worrying about all the things that could happen or could go wrong gets silly. Let’s say for example that you could work on cars and did buy a 2 grand used vehicle, would something that old have all the safety features of a brand new 2010 vehicle? Not really. Point being that in everything we do there is risk, at some point you have to say to yourself, I've done enough to lower the risk factors to where I feel safe to have a normal life.
2. Are there other issues at work here that makes her so adamant that you get rid of your car? With everything you've said so far in this thread it doesn’t sound like your wife is the convincible type. It seems like any facts that you arm yourself with will never be enough to convince her that the car is safe. If that’s the case then really you have two choices, compromise on the issue or do what you want regardless.
3. If there are so many safety issues why the car then why drive it yourself? If its not safe enough for a baby, then why would it be safe enough for you? At this point I think that the 8 is probably one of the safest sports cars on the road. We've seen several threads on this board of some crazy accidents that people have walked away from with bumps and bruises while the car was literally shredded. Just doing a quick google search I am sure you can find multiple wreck threads that look amazing awful with no serious injuries.
Keep in mind, I say all of this with a pregnant wife who is due in July that is very supportive of the car. Marriage is an interesting thing, and in all honesty the goal of a marriage should be to constantly make your spouse happy. In a good marriage this works both ways so that you are always pouring into the other. Why do you think the divorce rate is so high today? So many people today approach marriage as a means to get something out of it with selfish reason. My wife knows how happy driving the 8 makes me, and I know how happy other things make her. Just some food for thought.
My wife just worries way more than she needs too and I can completely understand that. She just needs assurance that it will all be alright and with this thread I can show here that it will.
03-16-2010, 01:19 AM
#23
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What brand of car seat and stroller do you use? The stroller fits in the truck right?
03-16-2010, 10:14 AM
#24
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In the end it's going to have to be a family decision that is mutually agreed to. I'd just be straight forward and ask her what the real reason she doesn't like your car is. You clearly stated that she doesn't care for it and it sounds like a baby is just an excuse. The key to resolving the issue is to get down to why she really doesn't like it. Making a case for why you do and why you feel it's safe isn't going to change her mind. You need to understand what exactly her issue with it is. I guarantee it isn't baby safety. How could it be? She drives a Civic! I have one too btw and I'd never claim it to be as safe as an RX-8. It's not. Only after you get to the core of her dislike for it can you make the case and it shouldn't be a fact based one. She isn't arguing through facts and doesn't want to hear them. She is arguing from emotion. Once you figure out what the issue is, then you need to make your desire to keep it an emotionally important one to you. If you sit there and try to convince her through technical stats, she's only going to hate you for it and the car even worse and you'll be playing into her hand by playing her game. That's what she wants you to do.
03-16-2010, 03:34 PM
#25
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In the end it's going to have to be a family decision that is mutually agreed to. I'd just be straight forward and ask her what the real reason she doesn't like your car is. You clearly stated that she doesn't care for it and it sounds like a baby is just an excuse. The key to resolving the issue is to get down to why she really doesn't like it. Making a case for why you do and why you feel it's safe isn't going to change her mind. You need to understand what exactly her issue with it is. I guarantee it isn't baby safety. How could it be? She drives a Civic! I have one too btw and I'd never claim it to be as safe as an RX-8. It's not. Only after you get to the core of her dislike for it can you make the case and it shouldn't be a fact based one. She isn't arguing through facts and doesn't want to hear them. She is arguing from emotion. Once you figure out what the issue is, then you need to make your desire to keep it an emotionally important one to you. If you sit there and try to convince her through technical stats, she's only going to hate you for it and the car even worse and you'll be playing into her hand by playing her game. That's what she wants you to do.
