Weird ssv, misfire and oil problem. Need help tracking it down.
 

Okay so about a week ago my battery bit the dust. It was under warranty so I replaced it. After I replaced it, within a week I started having a slew of problems. My ssv is tapping now, hesitates to accelerate, and misfiring on "cylinder 2". Thinking it was the valve sticking, I pulled it and replaced with a new one and it's doing the same thing. In my test drive it blew out the dipstick and sprayed a quart of oil all over the back of the engine. Im at a loss on What my problem is. I wouldn't think the ssv would cause oil pressure to rise and I'd think it would be random misfire codes not the specific cylinder 2 code. I don't have any codes other than the misfire and my oil light never came on. Could the ssv be its own problem and the misfire and dipstick mean bad engine seal and I just have shitty luck for it to happen at the same time?

Misfire: ignition coils. Dipstick blowing out: bad seal, blowby, engine on last legs. Get it tested.
I would ask what caused your stil-under-warranty battery to die and could that have caused other electrical problems (including ignition).
The dipstick thing though, that's pretty indepedent.

IDK it was a 2.5 year old redtop that started giving me issues cranking.

So the dipstick is basically bad seal period? Nothing else really causes it. Cuz it's an 05 so I know there's no real pcv system. Damn jusy had the motor replaced about 10k miles ago :(

There is a PCV system, it's built into the oil filler neck on all models. It's just not a separate element like a conventional engine. So yeah, long and short of it is the dipstick gets blown out by blow-by gases, and there's only one way blow-by happens, just like in a conventional engine: poor sealing around the combustion chamber.

So this motor is fresh? Who rebuilt it and with what parts? I would have many questions for them about why it appears to be dying. By all means have a compression test done to confirm the diagnosis, but I don't see how this could be anything else.

Well, the dealer put a damn used engine with 40k on it when the last engine failed. Could the misfire be related to the oil issue too? Cuz dealership wouldn't even do a compression test till they replaced the coils last time engine failed. Could I expect it to consistently fail a compression test? Dealer wants 200$ just to test it q.q

I'm trying to figure out how the dipstick gets blown out unless the breather tubes that connect to the accordion tube have been capped or are otherwise clogged.

Overfilling the oil can cause a short term misfire as the oil gets puked up the breather tubes and into the intake track. If that's the cause, the misfire will go away once you drain a little oil. I know this from experience.

If it's an 06 or later engine and has the new PCV routing, including a check valve, its possible the checkvalve is clogged or misrouted. I feel like that's one way to create the dipstick oil volcano condition.

With enough blowby, you can pop out the dipstick even with a functioning PCV. Ask how I know (but not on a rotary).

Definitely give the intake cleanup and oil drain suggestion a try though.

That's what I was wondering too, I was thinking maybe the pressure in the pan rose quick burst more than the breather hose could handle and it popped the stick out that way. But the oil was at 3/4 when all the issues started so it wasn't overfilled or anything. I'mma change the oil just to be sure but ya confusing.

Ya mines an 05 so I got a hose from filler neck to accordion hose. My first thought was faulty pcv valve but after looking I couldn't find a valve and figured it was a rotary thing with passive pcv via the hose

Okay so I was thinking maybe a faulty oil filter/ oil may be my problem but after changing it the problem persists. At around 5.5k rpm the engine putted and dipstick popped out and oil everywhere. It's weird that I'm not burning the oil though.