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08-04-2004, 12:37 PM
#1
Registered User
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Arizona
Posts: 4,160
What makes life 100%? FUNNY!
Ever wonder about people who say they are giving more than 100%?
We have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%. How
about achieving 103%? Here is a little math that might prove helpful.
What makes life 100%?
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Is represented as
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26
Then:
H A R D W O R K
8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98%.
K N O W L E D G E
11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96%
But,
A T T I T U D E
1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100%
And,
B U L L S H I T
2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103%
So it stands to reason that hard work and knowledge will get you close,
attitude will get you there, and bullshit will take you over the top.
But look how far *** kissing will take you.
A S S K I S S I N G
1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7 = 118%.
So the next time someone asks you to give more than 100%, you know what is
required of you.
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08-04-2004, 12:44 PM
#2
Short Bus Allstar!
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 607
Quote:
Originally Posted by abbid
So the next time someone asks you to give more than 100%, you know what is
required of you.
MEOWLOUD = 108%
COWBELL = 90%
I guess I need to put out more :D :D
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~ If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic. ~
-Jack Handy
08-04-2004, 12:46 PM
#3
Registered User
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Arizona
Posts: 4,160
abbid = 18%
i need alot of A S S K I S S I N G
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08-04-2004, 03:10 PM
#4
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Destin Florida
Posts: 206
That certainly makes a lot of sense to me! That is the exact reason that I resigned from my position at my restaurant, 4 partners against one but he kissed the most butt so the majority shareholder took his side. I'm Quadrupling his salary now and don't care that much anymore. They got what was coming to them after I left.
08-04-2004, 03:56 PM
#5
BLAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Chicago
Posts: 370
thats pretty funny.
Do you guys remember Wesley "Two Scoops" Berry from American gladiators back in the day. He won everything and always said he gave 115% or something. I always think of that guy when I hear about >100%
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My girls ---> '03 HONDA RC51 / '02 HONDA CR250R
08-04-2004, 04:02 PM
#6
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Destin Florida
Posts: 206
2 Scoops!! I watched the re-runs of AG on USA until they finally re-ran them too. He was the man though!
08-04-2004, 04:03 PM
#7
Sponge Bob RotorPants
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Maryland
Posts: 454
Quote:
Originally Posted by Meowloud
MEOWLOUD = 108%
COWBELL = 90%
I guess I need to put out more :D :D
I have a fever...
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2004 Sunlight Silver / Black/Red
Received 7/23/3
08-04-2004, 04:15 PM
#8
Registered User
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Rancho Cucamonga, CA
Posts: 74
kid icarus
11+9+4+9+3+1+18+21+19=95% dam I need more attitude. As for Two Scoops I remember he started at 100% then by the end of the grand champions I think he hit 230%. That guy was comedy.
08-04-2004, 04:59 PM
#9
Short Bus Allstar!
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 607
Quote:
Originally Posted by pmacwill
I have a fever...
and the only prescription.. is more COWBELL! :D
__________________
~ If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic. ~
-Jack Handy
08-04-2004, 05:02 PM
#10
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Destin Florida
Posts: 206
Don't Fear the Reaper is not even a song without the cowbell!
08-04-2004, 05:08 PM
#11
Short Bus Allstar!
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 607
Quote:
Originally Posted by mpt_yellowRX8
Don't Fear the Reaper is not even a song without the cowbell!
Amen! These guys know what we're talking about
:
http://www.geekspeakweekly.com/cowbell/
__________________
~ If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic. ~
-Jack Handy
08-04-2004, 05:15 PM
#12
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Destin Florida
Posts: 206
HAHA! I disagree with them on Time in a Bottle. That is one of the greatest songs ever written, and it means so much more because of Jim's death.
08-04-2004, 05:21 PM
#13
Lubricious
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: SF Bay Area, California
Posts: 3,416
"give 110%" - these are the same people who usually want it "done yesterday". Oops, wrong universe - get back on the bus! :p
08-04-2004, 06:53 PM
#14
Registered
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 815
M a g i x P u m a
13 1 7 9 24 16 21 13 1= 105% I always new it was magical see its the extra 5% that gives me that edge
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blue rx8 in stall mode.
08-04-2004, 08:34 PM
#15
mostly harmless
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Greater Vancouver Area, BC
Posts: 3,396
wakeech = 23 + 1 + 11 + 5 + 5 + 3 + 8 = 56%
man, i'm such a fuggin' slacker.
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dig http://www.rotaryengineillustrated.com !!!
08-04-2004, 08:57 PM
#16
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Destin Florida
Posts: 206
mpt_yellowrx8 = 13+16+20+_+25+5+12+12+15+18+24(+8)= 160% (168%)
Wakeech, you can take some of mine, I don't need it anymore!
08-04-2004, 08:57 PM
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