View Full Version : ~ LONG Stupid, But True, Story.............. ~


Meowloud
08-20-2004, 12:43 PM
The following is a True Story. It could happen to anyone’s mother… even yours!

Background: Department store. Morning of Thursday, August 19th.

On that Hot, humid day my mother decides she wants to go shopping. Of course, my father eventually caves in and has to take her or he will be subject to 1 – 4 days of pouting and/or ignoring. They arrive at the store to find it almost empty! “Must be a slow day” they say to each other and continue in their quest to annoy each other. Being an older woman with bladder issues, she soon finds herself in need of a restroom. Upon finding said restroom, she notices that she has seen maybe (5) people the entire time in the store, and even now… no one is around!

Entering the vacant restroom, mother eyes an open stall that is marked ‘Handicapped’. Being in a wheelchair and handicapped herself, she decides that one must have the bars and be large enough to get her wheelchair in. She rolls right in to find a little girl sitting on the commode. Mother is immediately embarrassed and hurries to get out of there as the little girl says, “I’m in here. Hello! My name is (can’t remember).”
“Hi” said mother.
Little girl replied with, “Did you like my panties?!”

OK. I have to pause here… if you are alone in a restroom with a little girl, and you get asked “did you like my panties” the last thing you are going to say is Yes! :p
For fear of the Pedophile Police, my mother fibs and says that she didn’t see them. Which gets a full description about the panties from the little girl!
Mother is now REALLY wondering where this child’s mother is! The one-sided conversation continues with “what’s your name… I have a hamster… would you like to come over to my house and see my hamster… I know my telephone number… Do you have a dog… I’m 4 years old, how old are you (the sadest part of this story, my mother couldn’t even tell her age to a 4 yr. old! :p )….BLAH BLAH BLAH”

At this time, mother’s eyes are floating like a candy bar in a public pool and her two “are you done honey?” comments had remained “NO” from the little girl. Mother knew she was trapped, as she could never get to another restroom and those Depend Briefs only hold so much.

FINALLY, the girl’s mother comes in. “Hurry (can’t remember)!”
“I am! I’m poo pooing,” girl replied. (My mother's weak stomach turns)
Which got a, “I’m going to quit taking you shopping. You do this every time!” Then she notices my mother sitting there observing and she adds, “you don’t have to wait on her, she’s fine.” (LOL)
To which my mother said, “Uh, I’m not waiting on her.. I’m sure you were somewhere close, even though I haven’t seen you for the last 10 mins. Actually, I’m waiting on the Handicapped stall since I’m HANDICAPPED”.
*Crickets chirping*
“Honey, hurry up.. this lady needs in there! Oh, you really did poo poo!” And FINALLY they were exiting the stall. But just before they get out of the door, the little girl adds one more thing… “Mommy, that lady liked my panties!” :D

Side note: While telling me the above story, along with the OBVIOUS talk and disgust of the neglect from her mother.. my mother added that the little girl was so proud of her panties, that she could see her as a 16 yr. old telling all the boys that too :p

guy321
08-20-2004, 01:08 PM
LOLOLOL..

That's FUNNY..

That woman was lucky your mom didnt report her to the cops for leaving her child unattended in a public place!!

MadRonin
08-20-2004, 01:09 PM
Well, at least she didn't find any poo-poo ON the toilet. :p

TODreamer
08-20-2004, 01:09 PM
LOL..... that lil girl baited out your mom big time

Meowloud
08-20-2004, 01:12 PM
I should have ended the post requesting for other FUNNY PARENT STORIES :D :D

guy321
08-20-2004, 01:14 PM
I had a similar story, I was in a club about to pee in the stall because the urinal had pee all around the floor and there was a line in the girls room so this one girl comes in and she wants to use the stall before me becuse she really has to go..

so she takes her panties off (wearing a skirt) and tosses them at me and jumps in the stall..

I had to wait for her cuz i didnt want to go swimming :/

*edit*

I still have exhibit A also..

Hey, they are like a size 4.. why does the tag say Grande?

zoom44
08-20-2004, 01:43 PM
was your mom having flashbacks to little meowloud?

Winning_BlueRX8
08-20-2004, 01:45 PM
hahah good read. too funny. "poo pooing" hahah

SiMplyBluE
08-20-2004, 02:04 PM
I had a similar story, I was in a club about to pee in the stall because the urinal had pee all around the floor and there was a line in the girls room so this one girl comes in and she wants to use the stall before me becuse she really has to go..

so she takes her panties off (wearing a skirt) and tosses them at me and jumps in the stall..

I had to wait for her cuz i didnt want to go swimming :/

*edit*

I still have exhibit A also..

Hey, they are like a size 4.. why does the tag say Grande?
Guy we know you're a panty thief, so stop trying to create an alibi for yourself last night......

Meowloud
08-20-2004, 02:07 PM
why does the tag say Grande?
Because she couldn't remember what she charges?? :confused: :D (sorry, bad joke)

RX-Dreamer
08-21-2004, 04:13 AM
I had a similar story, I was in a club about to pee in the stall because the urinal had pee all around the floor and there was a line in the girls room so this one girl comes in and she wants to use the stall before me becuse she really has to go..

so she takes her panties off (wearing a skirt) and tosses them at me and jumps in the stall..

I had to wait for her cuz i didnt want to go swimming :/

*edit*

I still have exhibit A also..

Hey, they are like a size 4.. why does the tag say Grande?

She was probably inviting you to follow her.

Sky88
08-21-2004, 09:50 AM
She was probably inviting you to follow her.

Yeah sounds like an invitation to me.

Nubo
08-21-2004, 01:42 PM
Funny Parent story -

I think it was '68 or '69. We travelled from OH to visit relatives in CA. Of course had to go to Disneyland. I was about 10. Once there, adults and "kids" split up. Remember, this was a at a time when it wasn't considered criminal to let kids go off by themselves. One of the cousins was 13 or 14 so we were considered "supervised". It was certainly practical as we could run around at our own pace and the adults could plod along at theirs, stop to pee every 20 min, visit the dumb souvenir shops, etc :). We'd meet every few hours to assure them we were still alive.

As luck would have it, some radical group (I think it was the "Yippies") picked that day to "take over" the park as a protest. Us kids saw stuff starting to go down and began following some of these people around. We ended up on "Tom Sawyer's Island", which was only accesible by boat/raft. The Yippies claimed the fort on the island, the island itself, raised the Viet Cong flag tied up the boats and started to party. So we were on the island "for the duration". We had a grand time. Didn't see any violence, everyone seemed pretty cool.

Meanwhile, on "the mainland" all hell was breaking loose. The park was officially shut down and everyone ordered out as the riot police attempted to regain "control". I believe this was the first time in history the park ever shut down early.

So, getting back to this being a "funny parent story"... As everyone is filing out of the park, my Mom stays and is running around searching for her stupid kid. The police stop her and insist she has to leave the park as it's "too dangerous". She tells them the only people she sees acting violently are the Police and she has to find her kid. "Sorry Ma'am, you're going to have to leave". She says "Well, you're gonna have to arrest me then because I'm not leaving here without my GODDAMNED KID"! At this point she's about equally pissed off with me and the cops. :)

Well, fortunately for all concerned, the island had been "liberated" and I showed up. I just think it's funny that my Mom gave the cops a harder time than any of the protesters :D. God bless her.