Tonight was the first time my car got bombed by a bird. I went to the store at 11PM at night. I go late at night because it's not crowded and so that I can park where there a no cars around me to do harm.

Well tonight I parked in parallel stall that happened to be under a tree. Don't birds sleep at night? I probably parked under the only tree on the island with a bird taking a crap at 11PM at night.

When I came out of the store I took a brief look around like always do. I'm getting in the car and then I notice this brown/white spot on the roof about the size of a quarter.

AHHHHHHH!!!!!

Now I'm starting to panic. I don't have any kleenex with me. I don't have any water in my trunk. So I think quick and grab the sales receipt. I tear of a piece and do the old slide it under trick and luckily this isn't real wet stuff so I pretty much get under all but a very tiny piece.

I can't get the tiny piece off now cause it's too small to slide under so I tear off another piece of the receipt and use 2 pieces and slide them together to get it off.

Now I'm thinking there must be some residue left on the roof so what do I do? I wipe it with my hand :( Fortunately I had a 20 oz. Diet Pepsi that I bought...no I didn't pour it on the roof. I used the condensation on the bottle to sort of wash my hand and wipe it on my shirt :( I just Zainoed the car on Sunday so it helped a lot in protecting it from the turd...it kind of just slid right off. Phew...almost had a heart attack.

When I get home from the store...it's midnight already. I get out my wash bucket and fill it with water and wash down the roof and give it the Z6 treatment. Am I insane or what ;)

I got attacked by a flock of seagulls a month ago- it was awful. My company's building is right next to a lake full of the nasty things, and apparently they flew over and decided my beautiful dark green car was the place to go. Thanks to the Zaino they came right off with a little Z6.

When I was stationed in Germany at Fleigerhorst Kasern in Hanau I bought a '92 BMW 318i and I had to park it outside at night, no garages for EM in govt quarters.

Well our building and only our building was home to 300 swallow nests. At 8pm and 8am they would all come out at the same time to feed and wreak havoc on the unsuspecting cars below. We could not touch them as they and their nests were protected by German law. They would get your car at least 10-20 times a day from spring to fall. The berries they would eat made for a downright nasty turd that would actually bubble your paint to the point that you could tick it out with your fingernail. I invested in a very expensive car cover to keep from damaging my proud investment!

The reason I get so paranoid about bird turd is that my 1984 RX-7 got bombed when it was new and it was out in the sun and the turd got baked on and it left mark on the hood that could not come off...it kind of burnt right into the paint. Bird turd is nasty stuff if you leave it on too long.

From now on I will carry a gallon of distilled water and a soft 100% cotton towel in my trunk for bird turd emergencies. I'm determined to keep my 8 looking as new as possible for as long as possible. During my last wash and polish session I did start noticing some tiny chips/scratches/marks on the front bumper and part of the hood. I guess you have to expect it unless you keep your car locked in a garage forever...or get a car mask (don't like the term car bra).

LOL. Some things we do for the love of our cars :- )

Here in Texas we have a Big Problem with the Smart a.... Truck drivers, they drive like the own the Da.. Street, The first day i got my car driving back home (80 miles from dealer) this Construction Truck pass me doing like 80 mph, trowing rocks all over the highway, i slown down to let him go away, but i saw this big rock bouncing coming my direction...oh!!!!!! NO!!!!!!! hit my windshield and i just allmost had an heartattack....pull over and it just left a minor scar, not a chip just a scratch, so now i in the look for those trying to pass me...:)

I3man: yes, you are insane. Why don't you hire this guy to stand by you car when you go somewhere, and he could even wipe off the bird poop for you.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=31&item=2977956446

Just keep your wife's friggin Christmas stuff away from your car or this might happen.
:mad:

This bird crapped on my car on the day before X-mas day, and I had last minute shopping to do. Since I was so far away from home, and it was only on my left fender area, I took a wizz and used my urine to dilute the bird poop off of the spot. Yes I love my car, and I washed it the next day.... gotta do what you gotta do.

<Yes, This was meant for sarcastic humor, I didn't piss on my car>

I can't beleive it I have been so careful with my 8 trying to keep it from getting chips and scratches. So what happens I open my garage door and get in my 8 to back it out and hear a huge bang in the back. I get out to find the damn handle and locking assembly has fallen off the garage door onto my trunk, I just about died then threw a temper tantrum throwing the parts across the room. I now have two scratches and 2 huge chips on the trunk of my new winning blue 8. :mad: :( . I am going to attemt the repair this weekend.

I carry a little bottle of Meguiars Quick Detailer and a few small cotton towels around in the trunk for bird attacks - as others have noted, the quicker you get it off, the better. After I've cleaned the offending substance off, I track down the bird responsible and fricasee it. :D

Be careful to wash your hands after messing with bird droppings, especially if you live in the central/south part of the US - they can carry a fungus that causes histoplasmosis, a nasty respiratory disease that can also attack the eyes. (A friend of mine had to have laser surgery on his retina because of this stuff a few years ago.)

My car was hit with bird turd, more often, in two months of driving than with other vehicles in ten years combined! Does the shape of the car attract the birds to do their 'thing' or is it coincidence? I don't have a garage so I might have to put a car cover on it at nights.

My bad luck is these darn red cardinals of all things, that for some reason feel the need to find my mirrors and then flap agaisnt them, scratch the paint on the door, and crap all over the place.

*sigh* At least I can scare them off and clean it up decently, but even pulling the mirrors in doesnt help. I need to make some covers or something.

My wife and I just moved to Maryland about a month ago, and we've been staying with relatives until we close on our house (about 2 weeks from now). Unfortunately, they live in a townhouse with a full row of trees in front of the parking spaces. I've never owned a car that received this much bird crap. Fortunately it's rained regularly enough since we've been here to wash it off (so the new bird crap has clean paint to land on). I did finally find a car wash that will do (in the interim). The people in my house-to-be need to hurry up and GTFO, as it's time for a real car washing and waxing.

This has been posted before, but it's still funny (and on topic)

http://www.punchbaby.com/media/gitfakt/clips/sick/Bird.mpg

i3man, I completely understand your story. :)

Another thread for the Multimedia forum: "Post your bird turds!" :D

Damn, I never imagined this thread would resurface. I now carry a gallon of distilled water in the trunk and a bunch of cotton towels. I just hope I get back to the car if I ever get bombed before it gets baked on by the hot sun.